Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Ew. Zits schmits.

Dude.
Ever since I stopped taking my birth control pills,
my face has been acting a fool.
I feel pubertal.  Call me Pimps McGee.
(Read: the square footage on my chin with zits
vastly outweighs the square footage without.)

Herein lies the problemo: 
Tazorac (wonder cream prescribed by my Derm that not only works as zit cream, but also reduces wrinkles - magic !!) is teratogenic. 

Definition:
Teratogenic: Able to disturb the growth and development of an embryo or fetus.

Now before you all go and get all giddy,
Alex and I are NOT actively trying to get knocked up.
BUT...since we've pulled the goalie and
it's a possibility that conception could occur,
I've been fearfully skipping the zit cream.

(Future baby, you can thank your non-vain mother later....
but wait until I manage to kick the nightly wine habit.)

Attention new mommies/preggos (or 15-year-olds):
Is there something non-toxic that I can use on this hormonal acne??
I have resorted to natural remedies (egg masks, toothpaste, etc.) to no avail.
Can you imagine what will happen to my face when I actually AM  with child?
I will probably look like Sherman from American Pie.

So if you see me, please don't think poorly of my hygiene.
It's the hormones...and my good intentions.

~Image via Ann Taintor~

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